The faux-lesbian singer Katy Perry debunked reports suggesting that she would remain celibate during 2009, and opts for non-celibacy for fear of actually dying. Read on for the most relieving story imaginable!

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Historically at the Hollywood elite red carpet, most celebrities keep their political views to themselves. This can also not be said about Anne Hathaway.

Horror films have achieved many grisly innovations over the years – from The Texas Chainsaw Massacre ('74), to The Texas Chainsaw Massacre ('03), and even The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning. Yet a new film, The Unborn (Jan 9), will be the first horror movie featuring a body part of Odette Yustman (Cloverfield).

I’m not one for hyperbole, but clearly a fact: red-hot gymnast, Alison Carroll – the latest babe to take on the bra-filling mantle of video game star, Lara Croft – is better than anything in existence, and also (I’m told) makes my pants look fantastic.

Sultry star of Quantum Of Solace, Olga Kurylenko, is the kind of sexy Bond girl fodder that you would come to expect from the long-running series, but the actress, and her character, are anything but the status quo.

Cinema duo Kat Dennings and Michael Cera (though not an item in real-life) was quite the adorable odd couple at the premiere of their new/old movie Nick And Norah's Infinite Playlist. I find them to be an odd couple since one looks like a hot, ghoulish (or supernatural) bassist for a progressive metal band, while the other, an impish, Elf-like, aspiring dentist -- under Santa’s employ -- who perpetually looks like he’s about to be hit with a pie.

Mascot for far-right American conservatives, Sara Palin (whose daughter, upon turning 18, will be very hot), has garnered suspicion among voters on whether or not she is truly ready for the big leagues after some gaffes during key interviews.

I don’t trust movies packed haphazardly with women. When a group of women get together (the premise of The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2), it’s nothing but bad news for me. For example: they find new ways to write on my car, adjust to the same cycle, reject the need for men (producing asexually), and ultimately becoming more powerful than I could possibly imagine. Oh, and when they get together, my paranoia goes up, too.